Does it still make a sound?

The answer is NO!  I know this because our Christmas tree fell last night.  Not for the first time, or even the second, but the third.  The first time we had this tiny tree stand, that couldn’t support the huge tree and it keeled over before we even pulled out the decorations.  Then my brother went out and bought this super strong, heavy tree stand, but we didn’t get the tree tightened down enough and it fell on me when I was putting up the decorations.

I was in the other end of the house (which isn’t very far) helping Shannon get ready for bed when Emma runs into the room with this horrified look on her face. She looks at me and says, “Mommy come quick! Really come quick!” And I ask her why as I’m following her and she tells me the Christmas tree fell.  I figure it’s just leaning, has come loose from in the stand again (poor Emma, I can see the therapy bills already.  She tells me these things and I never believe her) and I walk into the living room, and sure enough, the tree is lying on the floor.  Interestingly, the stand is still on the bottom of the tree, up in the air. 

I start freaking out because all the presents are now covered in water and I bought the girls a bunch of books.  I scream for my brother (who is on the phone in the basement) and he comes up, sears and hangs up the phone.  We stand the tree back up, all the while he’s muttering under his breathe about the piece of crap tree stand, etc.  While he holds the tree up, I grab all the presents and take them into the kitchen to dry them off.  Only one got really wet, and it was something plastic, so I was able to dry it off.  And only 3 ornaments broke, and one of those is repairable and 2 I didn’t even really like. 

I went back over to hold the tree so it could be readjusted, and then I realized that Bart the Bird is hiding behind his cage in terror.  This poor bird has witnessed this tree falling three times, the top landing within 2 feet of his cage each time.  The whole thing struck me as incredibly funny and I started laughing I stumbled and broke another ornament, which just made me laugh harder. I mean, come on!  It’s funny.  How hard is it to put up a tree?  Apparently very difficult if you are us.

We still have a week to go, we’ll see if the tree makes it.

This morning Emma asked Shannon if she could borrow her Santa hat for school.  Shannon told her no, that she was going to wear it.  Well, this resulted in a crying fit since Emma doesn’t have a Santa hat of her own.  After unsuccessfully trying to convince Shannon to let her sister borrow it and making equally futile attempts to calm Emma down, I asked her if she wanted to use her allowance to buy one, and she said, yes, can we go right now?

So we rushed around to get ready faster and drove over to the drugstore to buy a Santa hat.  We find one that is slightly different from Shannon’s and Emma loves it.  We buy it, run back out to the car and race to school.  I’m helping Shannon gather up her stuff when she hands me the hat and says, “I changed my mind, I don’t want to wear it after all.”

I very calmly put it back on her head and said “oh, yes you do”, kissed them goodbye and drove off.

Last night, we got home about 6:30.  I, of course, had 4 BILLION things to carry in, and I was trying to get Shannon to help me.  Emma ran ahead to open the door.  Now, I should first point out that we have a small stoop at the front door, the kind where you step out of the house onto a 4x5 (maybe) slab, with the stairs to the sidewalk off to the side.  And then is a railing and bushes around one side and the front.  So it’s pretty small.  Anyway, Emma goes running up to the front door, screams and runs out into the yard.  She screams that there is a raccoon on the porch (keep in mind, this is the child that thought a squirrel was a skunk).  I go over and look, and there is no raccoon. She keeps screaming that there is a raccoon and it’s going to kill her.  I ask her where and she screams that it’s on the porch.  I go up onto the porch and, sure enough, a raccoon climbs out from under a small stool, climbs up onto the rail, over and down into the bushes.  Which set Emma off even more.  She just keeps screaming that he’s going to kill her.  And Shannon starts yelling at her to calm down and the poor raccoon, completely terrified by this time, runs over to our neighbor’s porch and under their bushes.  I thought for sure someone would call the police.

So then the neighbors come out to find out what the commotion is, I tell them it’s a raccoon and now it’s in their bushes (Ironically, this woman works at a wildlife sanctuary), and they too try to calm Emma down.  Then this poor raccoon runs out from under their bushes and climbs the tree in their front yard.  He goes all the way to the top and just clings to the branch, looking down at us.  Shannon drags the still screaming Emma into the house (where she finally calms down) and I go back and get all the stuff I was carrying that is now strewn all over the driveway. 

The poor raccoon was so traumatized by the whole event he stayed up in the tree for more than an hour.  I felt so bad for him I put out about half a loaf of bread for him.  I have a feeling we won’t have to worry about another visit from him tho.

We haven’t had a good laugh at my expense lately (yeah, I know, you’re not laughing at me, you’re laughing with me).  But you will have one know.

Our office party is this Friday.  Actually, there are two parties.  One for our department during lunch and another after work.  The lunch party is a potluck.  I had decided to make this thing called Crock Pot Chocolate Delight, which is served warm with ice cream.  So I thought I would be really smart and bring in the ice cream today so I wouldn’t have too much to carry on Friday.

I was yelling at the girls to hurry because we were late, as always, and I put my stuff on the front passenger seat.  I ran an errand, dropped them off at school and went to work.  I pulled into the parking lot, found one of the last spaces and started gathering my stuff up as I was opening the door.  I grabbed the ice cream and the container just collapsed in my hands, spraying the entire front of the car as well as me with melted vanilla ice cream.  Apparently the heated seat function was on!

Of course I don’t have time to clean up the car.  I just leave it and go into work, covered in melted ice cream, went into the bathroom and pretty much hosed myself off.  Now I’m sitting here, smelling like sour vanilla milk and dreading going out to my car after work.  And now I have to get more ice cream!!!!!

But my big question is:  how long is my car going to smell?

Wow, this weekend went by fast!  It started, of course, on Thursday night with the snow and a snow day on Friday for the kids.  Now, my office closes for nothing, NO MATTER WHAT.  So I had to scramble to find daycare for them.

Having handled that, I had to drive to work, in the blinding snow through the farm fields on unplowed roads (sorry Colleen).  But, I do have a Jeep, so in a twisted way, it was kinda fun.  I only got stuck once and trusty 4 low got me right out. 

Saturday was mostly playing out in the snow (after buying new snowboots for everyone, amazingly, the old ones that fit only a month ago were too small) and making cookies with my brother.

SUNDAY, after church, I was sitting down on the couch, waiting for Shannon and Emma to finish washing up after coring and peeling apples (my brother was making apple butter, he’s really becoming quite the domestic goddess), and out of the corner of my eye, I see Bart the Bird climbing down the side of his cage, and looking at the floor.  I said something about how it looked like he was going down to the floor, and my brother told me that he’s never touched the floor before, that he’s too scared.  So, imagine our surprise when he hops down on the floor, looks around and waddles over to me.  Then he just looks up at me.  And I looked at my brother, and he looks at me and says, “He’s never done that for me before”.  I pick him up and take him back to his cage.  And he does it again.

Oh boy.

So apparently I am still Bart’s new best friend.  Although he no longer tries to attack my brother.  So I guess that’s good.

And lastly, let’s not forget the start of the week.  My boss is out, my boss’s boss is out and I was soooo looking forward to a quiet day.  But when I got to work, I had a message from the school that Emma was sick.  Which is quite a dilemma because I can’t take the day off without either one of them here.  But I also have no place to take her when she’s sick.  Hmmm.  So, I did the only thing I could.  I ran over to the school and got her and brought her to work until her dad could take her, after lunch.  And she was miraculously healed by the time we got to my office.  But I do have to give her credit.  She was really good while she was here.  Except for when she made the announcement:

“Mommy doesn’t like work”

Nice.